MR PENDLE: Fed up with the Tinseltown awards hogwash

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WHEN it comes to awards ceremonies, you either love them or loathe them.

And Mr Pendle definitely falls into the latter category.

He would argue there are far too many of them, with the same people, films and programmes mysteriously being nominated for all of them.

The other week, we had the Oscars and BAFTAs, and there were the Golden Globes before them.

There are also the Emmys and the Soaps, and no doubt there are one or two others Mr Pendle cannot remember.

All have one or two things in common – there will be thousands of words written about which star wore a dazzling or daring outfit (when in reality neither is the case and they are simply wearing a reasonably posh dress which has had a couple of zeros stuck on the end of its price tag just because some star has designed or endorsed it).

And there will be the stomach churning (and in some cases worse) platitudes gushed by award winners about how wonderful everyone is (when in reality they can’t stand the sight of half of them).

Actors and actresses are always described as “handsome hunks” or “stunning starlets” when often, neither is actually the case – but who cares as long as the celebrity besotted public gets their fill of words and pictures of their heroes?

Well actually Mr Pendle does.

He does not want to read columns of drivel about how the colour of an actress’s hair or dress caused a sensation (really?) or how the appearance of a stubble-chinned actor left his female “admirers” weak kneed on the night (dream on, girls).

And consequently, as someone who refuses to be taken in by all the hogwash surrounding Tinseltown and celebrities, Mr Pendle has not watched, will not be watching, any of the ceremonies.

News that the Turkish referee who made the controversial decision to send the Manchester United player Nani off in their Champions League game had received death threats came as no surprise to Mr Pendle.

What would come as a surprise to him, though, would be if any of the empty-headed Neanderthals who send out these messages made a serious attempt to follow up their odious message.

This sort of thing, of course, is nothing new.

Football referees who have made decisions affecting teams in important games in the past have received similar messages from cowardly individuals who would not dare to say the same thing to the official if they met him face to face on a one-to-one basis.

Like many bully boys, they can bluster all they want with a gang behind them – but separate them from their equally oafish chums and they become a different lily-livered breed altogether.