My ire was triggered this week by the use of trendy language and anachronisms that can only be summed up in one word - annoying.
Even worse, some of the words on my hit list have been submitted and accepted by the English dictionary.
I feel betrayed.
Of course we all have our trigger points in language, where we simmer in silent resentment at those who use phrases we think we should be consigned to the bin rather than given credibility.
Popular word-allergens include ‘tweeps’, ‘amazeballs’ and my particular bete noir ‘listicle’.
It’s a list, for Pete’s sake - whoever Pete is.
Actually that’s quite annoying too.
If you also work in a newsroom or read news you’ll either be guilty or irritated by buzz phrases from ‘cheeky thieves’ to ‘axes falling’ and ‘caged criminals’ and yes - I have seen these in our titles in recent weeks.
But it’s in corporate life that this behaviour at its most irritating- in our ‘hyperconnected’ world, during ’webinars’ and ‘hangouts’ and ‘phoners’ discussing ‘verticals’, it can be ‘uber’ and ‘totes’ annoying and ‘hashtag’ enough to hit yourself in the fod, which apparently is kidspeak for forehead, particularly if you’re feeling a bit ‘hangry’.
New language has its place obviously, it is continually evolving, but quite why we need new words for perfectly functional ones is annoying.
When the phrase ‘streetfood’ became an excuse to charge eye-watering amounts for a burger and chips and then ‘humblebrag’ about it on Instagram, I do not know.
We’re being had.
There’s a perfectly good word for that - gullible.
So perhaps we should take a raincheck on annoying language going forward, peeps. It’s not entirely avoidable, but even ‘fashionistas’ have no excuse for the phrase ‘sideboob’ and as for ‘bougie’.. we all know when someone’s showing off, do we need to label it?
Possibly the only thing more annoying than this is email sign-offs replacing the traditional ‘ours faithfully’, ‘sincerely’, or even just ‘thanks’.
Top of the rubbish tip is ‘XOXO’ and ‘Best’, followed by ‘Laters’.
But let’s be honest, the outright winner of the most annoying word recently invented has to be ‘Brexit.’
Listicle (arrrr..) of annoying words and phrases in no particular order)
Sorry not sorry
What it is right?
Keep calm and.. (insert anything)
On like a car bonnet
You Ok hun?